Goodbye April, Hello May!
- Payton
- Apr 30
- 5 min read
Updated: Jul 9
You know this post will not fit the overall vibe or feel of this blog that I am trying to create, but I want this place to be a haven for hope. A burning candle in the darkest part of night. With the world getting warmer and the sun burning brighter I feel as if it is on appropriate that I share a little light and warmth. I feel a sort of duality similar to that of Persephone, I enjoy the darkness, but how can one not smile in soft sunlight. Today I want to wave a goodbye to the amazing month that April was and say hello to all the hope and warmth that May has to bring.
Well April, thank you for the most exhausting yet rewarding month of my life. I thought that March with Grad School acceptance and denials, Speech season wrapping up, and Musical in full swing that there was nothing else that could be thrown my way that could make me work at a quicker pace. I guess you just had to prove me wrong. But this month a was truly surrounded by love like I have never really felt before, and though it was exhausting I was never more supported through it. My friends and family helped make sure that I was well fed, well flowered, and well imbibed. I was truly surrounded by all the things that I love most.
The art that I got to take in this month was insane, and was a majority of this month. My student put on one of the best high school productions that I have ever seen, the energy and effort that they put in every performance made each of those all-nighters building costumes, props, and cue books worth it. They truly made all my wishes for this production come true. All the weekends at set work, spending spring break at the school, and the late nights trying to decompress from everything, putting off my writing. It was worth every hour, it was truly a delight and beautiful show to work on. Now we wait for ratings and scores from competition.
I also received probably the best gift I will ever be given, the most stunning portrait of my sweet cat (Jasper) and I. My assistant director created this painting for the grotto in our production of Disney's The Little Mermaid. She based it off of the one from the original animated film tweaking it for me. Then came the amount of sweetness form my Music Director and Students, leaving me with no words. The stunning flowers and notes, the signed posters and books, and sweet treats. I am having a hard time coping with the fact that this is my last production at this school, but I truly think I couldn't have gone out with a bigger bang. Directing this show has been one of the biggest pleasures and most proud moments of my life.
May Days
Knowing that this production has been one of the biggest parts of my life for the last 5 to 6 months its hard to let go and slow down. There is a hope that I hold that May can be a slower more healing time for me. That now that I no longer live in a dark theater I can enjoy some sweet sunlight. My life feels very similar to "The Tower" card in tarot, not in a destructive way but in a regenerative way. The tower must fall so that we can create something much bigger and better. Here are my goals for May using my 7 points for wellness and one personal desire.
Physical: I have spent the last few months with a stuffed schedule, now I need to focus on getting back into a healthy movement routine. I come back to the gym being gentle on myself when it comes to my expectations, but I am fully prepared to have my butt kicked a few times. The plan is gym 4x a week, expectation find some way to get your body moving for 45 minuets a day.
Emotional: Start a digital detox. I spent a lot more of my free time recently scrolling my socials. TikTok was a particular monster when it came to my screen time. I plan on lowering my intake of content and focus it on quality content that makes me feel better rather than numb.
Intellectual: I miss reading. You get a degree in literature and a job where you analyze it and you forget that once you only did it for fun. I have a goal this month to work through part of my TBR that is forever too long. My hope is 4 books this month, but my expectation is 30 minuets a day.
Social: With May including mothers day I want to put a focus on spending more time with my mother before I move. Talk with her about creating traditions or a schedule of time spent together. Really make sure I cherish living with her for the last time and letting her know how much I really am going to miss her.
Spiritual: Getting back in my self love practices that I often put on the back burner. My spirituality at its core is making sure I feel connected to the universe around me. With my focus being so much on other people and other things I need to spend my time grounding and working on my connection with myself before I branch back out again.
Environmental: TOUCHING GRASS AND TREES. In all seriousness I need to spend more time out doors. I have spent so much time cooped up indoors that the best thing for my wellness right now is taking off my shoes and grounding myself to the earth.
Nutritional: Cut out all fast food. I have spent the last month not meal prepping like I should, so this month I am not allowed to buy anything from any fast food chain. The only time I will be spending money on food is the grocery store or dinner out with friends at a sit down.
Personal: Spend this month utilizing my creativity. Write, read, record, and just spend the whole month finding new ways to create and build the life I am dreaming of. The last few months and the next few are filled with so many goodbyes because I am moving on to "bigger and better things". I hope that is the case, because life right now feels pretty big and beautiful. Here's to another month of growth.
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