If Only (Paytons Lament)

If only you could know

Why I don't want to go

All the dreams I'd give away

If only I could stay

If only you could know

how hard it is to go.

Dear my beautiful theatrelings,

I have spent a lot of time thinking about how to say goodbye, how do you ever say goodbye to something you love with all of your heart? Know that this is the most difficult thing that I have ever had to say goodbye to. You all have helped me create some absolute magic on the stage and form such beautiful connections off it. I seriously can not imagine a life without the creation of amazing art anymore, thanks to you all.

You have given me the courage to share my work and, with that, take criticism for what comes out of it. All of you have given me the confidence to chase things that I never thought possible for myself, not just from your belief in me, but your ability to move forward with confidence in every challenge that I threw at you. I have never had a group of people share in and reciprocate the amount of love and empowerment as you all have created with me.

My students, I will never be the same because of you. I have healed and grown so much in these last two years. There wouldn't have been as much of that if it were not for you. I would do it all again if I were ever given the chance, and I will forever cherish every memory and grey hair you all gave me.

Know that whether I am there or not, you will always have my support and love. I will forever be your biggest fan. Please continue to create real magic and never lose that spark of passion you all gave me in everything we did together.

With Love,

Payton French